Never The Two Shall Meet
by Jester's Lackey
Summary: Oneshot. The thoughts of two hedgehogs. Sonadow.


Greetings, one and all. I've just been informed that I now own Sonic Team and Sega! Ever wish you just heard that? Me too. Well, I can always dream. But for now, I don't own them, so I don't own Sonic or any of the others. Inspiration struck me, and I decided to write this ficcy. Then it sat on a disk for a few months, practically forgotten. However, thanks to a friend who knows who she is, I'm posting it. Have fun with my fic. Oh yes, now I must warn you. See, it says 'Warning'. That's how you can tell that it's a warning.  
  
WARNING: Hello? Is this thing on? Check, check. Can you hear me in the back? Yes? Okay. This fic contains shounen-ai. (Dun Dun DUN!) That's male/male relationships. Come on, say it with me. Male/male relationships. Did you say it? One more time. Male/male relationships. Not to sound rude or anything, but if you don't like that, then don't read it. Instead, look up. A little more. A little more. Okay, stop. Now look left. More. More. Oops, too far. Okay, right a teensy bit. There, stop! Now you should see a button labeled 'Back'. Press that. If you do want to read, then keep reading and you'll eventually get to the story. Remember, male/male relationships. Why do I feel like I've said that before? Male/male relationships. Am I done? I think so, let me check. Uh huh, uh huh. Yeah, I'm done! Now go!  
  
Never The Two Shall Meet  
  
A Very Special Sonic fic  
  
By Jester's Lackey (that's me!)  
  
-----  
  
God I'm pathetic.  
  
I'm only making myself miserable.  
  
But I can't help but watch him.   
  
I love the way his eyes grow in excitement at almost anything.  
  
His eyes.  
  
His beautiful emerald eyes.   
  
Why do I have to feel this way?  
  
I wish I could be right there, beside him. Just to be near him. That's all I want. I'd be happy just to be his friend. But then...if I were just his friend, I don't think I'd be able to stand not being WITH him.   
  
Of course, he doesn't even know I'm alive. No one does. That's the way I want it.  
  
Except for Rouge. She found me, at Emerald Coast, washed ashore, practically dead. She took me to the hospital, trying to save my life.   
  
It'd be easier if I'd died. Then I wouldn't have to deal with these feelings.  
  
Anyway, she saved me, but she didn't tell the others.  
  
Maybe she didn't want to bum them out if I did die.   
  
That is, if they would have cared in the first place. I know they wouldn't have cared. No one would have cared.   
  
That's the way it goes.  
  
I have to remember to thank her for not telling them.   
  
Then, when I had recovered, I asked her not to tell anyone I was alive. She didn't ask for a reason and I didn't give one.  
  
I couldn't have told her why. She wouldn't understand. I didn't even understand, not until I saw him for the last time on the colony.  
  
All I knew was that there was something about him which...intrigued me. Ever since I first saw him fight. You can tell just what kind of person he is from how he runs and fights. You can tell from his fluid motions.   
  
Heh, fluid. Like water. Blue water. Like his fur.  
  
I saw him and knew there was something different about him. But I couldn't be distracted. I had a mission.  
  
I don't know exactly what I saw. Myself, perhaps. I saw myself in him. I am sure that if the circumstances of my life were different, I'd be just like him.  
  
Maybe if I were more like him I could just tell him this.  
  
Even when we fought the Final Hazard together, I saw myself in him. We fought for the same thing, we thought the same thoughts. He even looked like me, blazing red eyes, upturned quills.   
  
He tried to save me, but he couldn't. I doubt he cared whether I lived or died. He just felt obligated since I helped him save the world.   
  
I would have made his life a living hell. It's what happens to everyone around me. Because of me, Maria died. Because of me, all those people on ARK died. Because of me, Gerald almost destroyed the world.  
  
Wait.  
  
There he is.   
  
I feel like I die every time I see him.   
  
But he's happier without me. I can tell from how he acts. He doesn't care whether I'm alive or dead.  
  
What I wouldn't give to be there, beside him, holding his hand.   
  
I know how I feel about him. But I also know that there's no way he would feel the same way. And I couldn't handle it if he didn't feel the same way about me.  
  
But if I never say anything, never let him know I'm here, then I can still believe that he might feel the way I feel. I can believe that we could be together.  
  
Even though I know it will never happen, it keeps me going that it could happen. It's all that keeps me going now.   
  
So I hide here, on the rooftops, watching him. It's been a while, now. But I continue to watch him and follow him.  
  
I love him, even if he'll never know.   
  
I love Sonic the Hedgehog.  
  
-----  
  
What's wrong with me?  
  
Why do I have to feel this way?  
  
Sure, I try to hide it. I act like nothing bothers me. Tails has no idea, Knux has no idea. The only one who probably does have any idea is Amy.  
  
The last person I'd expect to understand. Ironic.  
  
She knows something is wrong with me, even if I try not to show it. She must know, because she doesn't chase me anymore. Hell, she practically told me she knows.   
  
I miss him so much.  
  
If only he were here, beside me.  
  
But he's gone. Dead.   
  
I'd give anything to have him beside me.  
  
I fight to keep my feelings hidden. Putting up my normal, cool exterior. Anyone could look at me and think I was fine. That's exactly how I want it. That's how it has to stay. No one would understand.  
  
But I can't stand it! I'd take my own life, to be with him, but I can't leave Tails and Knuckles. They care about me, and I couldn't do that to them.  
  
When I first saw him, I knew there was something different. He was so dark, mysterious. Maybe that's what attracted me to him. But he was evil, and I couldn't let my feelings get in the way.  
  
Then he lost the darkness within him. He fought to help us. I knew he'd changed. I'd always known there was good in him, even if no one else saw it. Even if he himself didn't see it.  
  
When I saw him falling, I tried to save him. I wanted to save him. But he was already too far gone.   
  
I wanted to shout out to him how I really felt, but he wouldn't have cared anyway.   
  
What am I thinking? Even if he were alive, he wouldn't want to be with me. I can tell he's not like that.  
  
He's not that type of guy.  
  
On some level, I'm kinda glad he's dead. I don't have to deal with being near him and having him ignore my feelings.  
  
But he never would know, because I could never tell him. No way. If I told him, he'd shun me, and I couldn't handle that. Having him ignore me, hate me. I'd rather just hide these feelings and never have an answer than tell him and risk losing what little friendship we may have.  
  
But he's dead, so I don't need to worry about that. He'll never know.  
  
I remember his eyes. As he fell, he looked at peace. But there was something else. Something I couldn't identify.  
  
Eh, it's nothing.  
  
Maybe I'm not meant to find love.  
  
Love?  
  
Hah, this isn't love. I don't feel love. I can't feel love. I won't let myself.  
  
All I do is save the world. That's all that's important.  
  
...  
  
...  
  
But he IS my world.  
  
And I couldn't even save him.  
  
So maybe I'm not cut out to do this.   
  
I'm not in the mood to save the world anymore.  
  
It used to be fun. Now it feels like a chore.  
  
If he were here, I could do it.  
  
I can't stand the cold in here any longer, so I walk outside.  
  
I look at the street and see a shadow from a rooftop. I make believe it's him, watching me. Then I blush. He's watching me.  
  
I shake my head of those thoughts. He's dead. Dead.   
  
But I know what I feel.  
  
I don't want to say it, even to myself. It's too hard. But I know it's true.  
  
I love him, even if he'll never know.  
  
I love Shadow the Hedgehog.  
  
-----  
  
There it is. Hope you enjoyed it. Oh well, if the fancy strikes you, throw a review into the box on your way out. 


End file.
